If you put your best foot forward, you will be rewarded. If you do your part, if you take one step toward expressing all the greatness that lives within you, the universe will take a hundred steps toward you. But you must be willing to take the first step.~ Debbie Ford
I was so tired of feeling storm-tossed and twinkle-less over Christmas that decided I was going to go back to basics and work really hard at separating what I can control from what I can’t. One of the things that came up for me was how resigned I was becoming about my own less than vibrant health and the dreams I was no longer pursuing. I realised, just in time, that I was dulling my awareness deliberately, using some really devious devices to disconnect my gut feelings from my ability to analyse patterns. Some folk self medicate with drink, or do drugs; instead of writing, I was drowning myself in daily drudgery, deadening my brain with chick-lit drivel and sedating myself with evening DVD’s. Writing opens me up and keeps me aware and open, so it’s no surprise that I hadn’t logged on for a while, or didn’t read anything that got me reaching for a notebook to jot down quotes.
One of the little bits of synchronicity I told you about in my last post was getting a Kindle from my husband and kids for Christmas. It got me exploring different genres, just to see what was available, and downloading dozens of free samples from books. It was like being given bags full of samples in a sweet shop! One of the books I went on to buy was Debbie Ford’s The Best Year of Your Life
If you need a wee boost to get your year started, it’s the kind of book I’d recommend. She writes with an uplifting style that inspires and sweeps you forward, and even if you’re familiar with the tools, tips and nuggets of wisdom she covers, it’s a refreshing way to revisit old favourites. After I finished it, I gave it to my daughter to read; one of the most frustrating things about teenagers is how resigned they become to what they see as the ‘bad stuff’ happening in their lives. Seeing the damaging effects of resignation in someone so young made me very aware that in my fifties, I have to fight even harder not to let it drag me down. Learning to let go leaves me with that beach holiday feeling of getting clean and clear. Resignation’s not the same, nor is it the same as being ‘realistic'; it’s creeping and inciduous and disguises itself as a variety of malaises. It sits heavy in your heart and saps your soul.
Most of us are unaware of the extreme resignation that is brewing just beneath the surface of our consciousness. The voice of resignation is a little different for each of us, but its tone usually sounds something like this: “Why bother? It’s never going to happen. I don’t have what it takes. It’s too much work. I don’t have time. I can’t deal with it. I don’t deserve it.” When we fall short where we had hoped to succeed, when our day-to-day lives fail to resemble our visions of what is possible, when our goals haven’t turned into reality, our hope for a great life begins to die, our senses deaden, and gradually we become resigned about our futures. Since most of us are unaware of this fact or don’t know how to deal with it, we wind up spending countless hours and much of our attention trying to cover up our resignation and fill the void that exists inside of us. Instead of making peace with our past, we develop addictions, create drama, and attract upsetting incidents in order to change our focus and avoid the painful feelings of not having expressed our potential. Resignation comes in many forms. It might show up as cynicism, sarcasm, or hopelessness. It can feel like depression, sadness, loneliness, or emptiness. Left unexamined, our resignation will continue to mask the real issues at hand while diverting us from fulfilling our highest visions for our lives. ~ Debbie Ford
If you dug deep enough, would you find anything that you’ve become resigned about, something that might be stopping you creating the life and the changes you crave?